SWAMI NYMPHONANDA

Arindam: - Good evening viewers. Tonight, in this special episode of ‘WINE WITH ARINDAM’ of your favorite Royal Bengal Tiger (RBT) TV channel, we have invited a special Swami of India, who has been found in a compromising position with her girlfriends. So, viewers, please welcome the one and only “SWAMI NYMPHONANDA”. Swamiji, you are welcome to our show.

Nymphonanda: - Thank you very much. Actually, this is the first time in my life that I have been invited in any chat show on television.

Arindam: - Wow, then the credit goes to your compromising positions.

Nymphonanda:- No, I think that the credit should be given to that traitor of our Hindu Ashram, who clicked those videos to make MMS clips and sold it to the porn CD market and media channels to earn money.

Arindam: - Are you following the footsteps of Tiger Woods?

Nymphonanda: - I am not a married person like Tiger Woods. So, I am not cheating with anyone.

Arindam: - But, you are a Swami. As per the tradition of Hinduism, a Swami cannot have any love relationship with a girl. You have surrendered everything in front of the God.

Nymphonanda: - No, it is not always true. As per the concept of ‘Sanatan Dharma’, a swami can get married to his beloved woman.

Arindam: - Then, why are you not getting married to your lover; rather than vibrating your special vestigial organ?

Nymphonanda: - I was just about to do that, but some people intentionally created a scandal on me. This is a conspiracy to blame the Hinduism. Hinduism is the only religion, where, every woman gets ultimate respect and that is why the people of other religions are feeling insecure about it.

Arindam: - Hmm…but there are some other cases of Swamis throughout India, who are involved in sex rackets. Are they not committing any sin?

Nymphonanda: - Media people are targeting the Devdasis of our Hindu temple, to increase the TRP ratings of their TV Channel. There is nothing like that. Maybe, there are instances where an anti-social has become a Swami to safeguard himself from the Policemen. Those are exceptional cases. In every religious group, you will find these types of culprits. But, that does not mean that all Swamis are like that only. People always have a tendency to make scandals about a famous person. Nobody asks question to a woman, who sleeps with different partners on every alternate night. If you want their names, I can provide you. Those women are also celebrities. They always cheat their hubbies. Media people do not even dare to talk about them, because they are women. Media will always target good men like me. After all, this is my personal life. I can sleep with any woman.

Arindam: - Are you forcing the girls or is it always consensual?

Nymphonanda: - Of course, it is consensual. Boss, just visit our Ashram once. You will be just stunned to see the amount of respect a Swami get there from the Devdasis of the temples. Those Devdasis are always eager to take care of you, if you are really a good Swami. This ritual is not new. It is being followed since our ancient Rig Veda days. Media people should only point fingers at a Swami, if he is raping, molesting or sexually harassing any woman. Who knows, maybe, one day will come, when a man needs to seek permission from the media people to have sex with his wife, otherwise, they will make a secret MMS clip and broadcast it in their TV Channel by stating that a man is cheating his ex-girlfriends.

Arindam: - Ha ha ha…surely, it is the new era of Love, Sex and Cheating. Anyway, Swamiji, better be careful and perform those activities in the darkness only. Don’t even switch on a night bulb inside your bedroom while doing that. Thanks for coming to our show and sharing your views. Marriage is your only solution. Viewers, here we will end our show. See you again later; till then, Good Bye.